On Tattoos & Being A "Natural" Model

Anybody who has seen me naked (which is probably everyone reading this) knows I don't have any tattoos. I also don't have any piercings other than standard single ear piercings which I very, very rarely (like once a year) wear earrings in. But I'm not sure how many people actually know why. Or how many of you know about one type of tattoos that I have a not so secret, but kind of secret, obsession with.

One of my secret tattoo love photos ^_~
Photographer: Joshua Winstead, Henna by Magic Monkey Mehendi

First off, I am not anti-tattoos. I have many, many friends who have some beautiful tattoos. And I've seen my fair share of horribly done tattoos as well. I think they are just like anything else: if done well, they can be very beautiful, and if not, they can look pretty bad. I also think sometimes it doesn't matter how they look to the rest of us sometimes because many people get tattoos for specific reasons and to remind them of certain people or experiences in their lives. So to those of us on the outside looking it, the tattoo might be horrible, or badly placed, or inconsistent with the rest of their pieces, but to them, maybe that tattoo has a beautiful meaning or purpose.

When I was younger I actually thought I might get some tattoos. Something pretty extravagant too, like a huge cherry blossom tree on my back, or a big panther going down my back and butt, and with the tail around my leg, or a koi fish along my side. A lot of this was "inspired" by the guys I was interested in at the time since they all seemed to just love tattoos and thought tattooed women were very sexy. And bottom line, I wanted to be sexy because I really didn't feel very sexually attractive at the time. I know that sounds a little negative, but it's the truth.

Then I decided (or rather remembered) that I don't like needles and, more importantly, I don't like permanent things on my body. I used to dye my hair less natural colors because I knew I could always dye it back and/or it would finally grow out. The beauty and the drawback of tattoos are that they are pretty much forever (with some exceptions). And for me, that's just not something I want. I like to be able to be (or at least look) completely natural, so I've actively chosen not to modify my body in any permanent way.

And to me that is a conscious choice, just like people consciously choose to be modified. And I think conscious choices are something to be respected.

What's really kind of amusing is that sometimes I feel like the "odd" one because I don't have tattoos. I don't mean that as a bad thing, but I do find it interesting that as much as people say they want "natural" models, most of the most successful freelance models I know have tattoos. If I look on Zivity, I actually can't name more than a couple other fairly active Zivity models who are unmodified, though I know there are a few more at least.

I also find it interesting that so, so many photographers claim they want natural models, so I should be in quite high demand and able to charge somewhat of a premium rate, but I can tell you quite honestly that it is certainly not the case. Sometimes I wonder if I might actually be more successful if I did dye my hair a bold color and get some very tasteful large tattoos. Of course, I would never do those things because they would not be me and I would quickly wish I had not done them, but as a model, I do wonder. And before you flip out and try to tell me I should never change just for modeling and I am fine the way I am... cool your jets. Models wonder about these things. I think everyone does. But for models, this is our job and we do wonder if we could make changes that would increase our earnings. I don't hate my hair at all, I quite love it, and I definitely don't hate my body.

I actually just ordered some wigs thanks go my very supportive husband who made me go pick some out. I picked two in very unnatural colors and I'm sure you'll be seeing them soon after they arrive. The ones I chose were both curly with bangs/fringe. If I like these, I am sure I will be getting more. I think they'll be great for cosplay and fun for mixing up my look in photos, too.

Photographer: Joshua Winstead, Henna by Magic Monkey Mehendi

 And as for tattoos... I do have that secret tattoo love I mentioned at the start of this: henna (which is what is all of the photos in this post). It lasts just the right amount of time and the deep red on my skin tone is quite lovely. Unfortunately, it's quite expensive and good artists can be hard to find. I've had a couple friends in the past that did my henna, but they both moved away from me. I'm working on some projects to turn my body into a canvas again, so if you know any Detroit artists interested in working on a nude/semi nude tiny model canvas, let me know ^_~

I absolutely love having henna-ed feet!
Photographer: Trinity Roy, Henna by Magic Monkey Mehendi

Also, I do have a special project on Tumblr where I share nude, lingerie, and similar photos of un-modified women (basically, no piercings aside from single earrings, no plastic surgery, no tattoos). I am always looking for submissions and more followers: http://untouchedskinblog.tumblr.com ^_^

My Video Plan

Those of you who follow me on Facebook, either my profile or my page, probably saw me talking about videos over the end of this past week. I started Thursday with a short cell-phone clip of my voice saying thank you for reaching 1,250 followers on my Facebook page. This was my first speaking video ever published. Friday I finally uploaded a video of myself taking a shower, which was met with a lot of excitement, but then when I actually made it available for 20 votes on Zivity or something of similar value on my wishlist, nobody really jumped on the offer, or at least not that quickly. Which is okay, and I think I know why, but I'll get back to that in a moment. Then Friday night I did a test video of a nude blogging idea I had.

This isn't the first time I've experimented with video. I have a few art nude type videos up on Vimeo and a few hair brushing and foot fetish related videos between Vimeo and YouTube. To date, the foot fetish videos, with just one exception, have all been filmed in the tub with my cell phone. I've done a couple other videos similar to them showing other parts of my body and my face with my cell phone as well. I've done themed hair brushing and braiding videos. For example, I have one in a girdle skirt and a cardigan with pearls for a vintage feel. I've also done one that was just me in underwear brushing my hair. And finally, and first for me in terms of what I've filmed, are more artistic nude and lingerie videos of me doing this combination of slowly posing/dancing. Here is an example:

Many time I've run into the issue that 1) I can't post nude videos just any where and 2) In order to upload consistently as I would like to do, I really need to upgrade my Vimeo account. I also had a little creative hiccup where I was starting to drift a little bit from my personal goals and standards/limits. To be quite honest, I wanted to do things that I thought would garner me the most attention and the most views, and I think that is easily nude stuff. I was going to do a nude vlogging series. However, this again brings in the issue that I need more space on my Vimeo. I also feel that it would be taken as very sexual, even if I don't mean it to be.

So... after thinking about this way too much this weekend and really examining my goals, here is what I have decided to do:
1) More art nude videos like this: https://vimeo.com/86478562
2) More sensual lingerie and such like these two: http://youtu.be/12x3SI36kUc and http://youtu.be/MYk8oPXLjKA
3) A special hair brushing/play/etc project involving creating characters and scenes and so on.
4) More of the simple foot fetish videos I film on my cell.
5) A lingerie vlogging series.

Now before you pitch a fit and ask why I'm not doing the nudes as a vlog series, here is why: I can't post those confidently on YouTube and I cannot monetize them on YouTube. I don't want to post my videos on porn sites, so I need to create content that fits the guidelines of YouTube where I can monetize the content (via ads). I haven't had a lot of luck selling videos outside of specific types for Zivity sets. And I totally get why. There is a lot of nude video content that is free and I don't currently have a market of people who want to pay video by video to here me vlog about things. And as I said earlier, I feel like the fun part of vlogging and my personality and such might be overshadowed by the "OMG, she's naked! Boobs!" nonsense. I post nude photos all the time and I will keep doing nude artistic videos and all of the nude photos I can find to do. But really, I think I can make things fun and hopefully at least somewhat entertaining while wearing lingerie too. I don't have to be nude to be interesting, right? I'd like to explore some new styles, including non-nude work and I think this might be a fun way to do that.

With these videos, I will also be doing unboxing type videos from now on when I receive gifts from fans. I will thank you by name (unless requested otherwise) and when possible, I'll probably do a two part video. One part showing the items, and then another part trying it on. Since these will hopefully be YouTube safe, there won't be any nudity, though. I will still send each gift giver person of awesome a few cell phone photos of me trying the item on for the first time in my hallway mirror.

As far as the nude videos, those will all be going on Vimeo, along with any fetish videos (though YouTube safe fetish videos will go there as well). I am hoping that I can upgrade my Vimeo to Vimeo Plus which will allow me to enable something called Tip Jar which allows people to easily (I think) tip me for videos they like.

Oh, and for my Zivity fans, for a certain number of votes (to be decided, input welcome) I will do a simple, but very sincere thank you video probably hand-holding my phone and focused on my face. I am also planning to do more videos to go with sets as incentives for that.

So how can you help me with this endeavor if you want to? Lovely question ^_~ Here are the ways I can think of:
1) Help me upgrade my Vimeo. It costs $9.95 for a month, or $59.95 for a year. This upgrade will get me the Tip Jar function, but will also allow me to upload a lot more content (so more than one video per week). This is my top priority. Here is info on that: https://vimeo.com/upgrade1v2
2) Get me things from my wishlist that I can do unboxing videos on (which is anything on the list) or suggest items that you would like to see me have and be interested in getting for me. My wishlist (be sure to look on the left for categories): http://amzn.com/w/3IM2J0NK4WZ1L
3) Vote for my sets on Zivity. I generally use the money I get from Zivity to put back into my modeling either for make-up or wardrobe, unless I have a bill come up that absolutely must get paid first. You can see my Zivity sets here: https://www.zivity.com/users/Dekilah

If you want to chat with me about this, you can PM me on Facebook or e-mail me at dekilah@gmail.com. I am open to ideas for videos within the themes I mentioned too ^_^ I hope you guys will be as excited about these new and continued ideas as I am telling you about them!

A cute casual self portrait

My Weekend: FCBD & Detroit Rummage

I had an amazing weekend, so of course I wanted make a diary entry about it ^_^ Though, admittedly, this has taken me a little longer than I wanted to actually get together.

Saturday was Free Comic Book Day, and it was my first FCBD ever because apparently I am super late to the party. I went to Green Brain Comics because that is my official comic book store of choice. I went in there a while ago with my husband to drop off some flyers and ended up spotting Bodie Troll comics right away. Bodie Troll issues #3 and #4 were my first comic purchases ever (for myself). I finally got #1 and #2 off of Ebay since they couldn't get them in the store. And for FCBD I got the special FCBD issue and a coloring book ^_^ Annnnnd a picture with the Bodie Troll creator Jay Fosgitt!

Me with Jay ^_^ Yes, I am that tiny :P

I also got drawn as a cat doing human things by another awesome artist named Rachel Polk. I picked up the two little mini comics she had featuring cats (of course) and an adorable little chubby bird. In case it's not obvious, I like cute things. I know I like to dress like an evil queen and I know I pose nude and stuff, but I love cute things and I love animals. Seriously. Bring a pony or a large dog in front of me and I will stop pretty much anything else I am doing in a hurry so I can pet it.

Me drawn as a cat with a camera, by Rachel Polk

My cute little signed comics by Rachel Polk

And of course I got several other things as well. The ones on the left were all free comics, and the ones on the right were things I purchased. Sorry about the bad lighting in some of these, I am horrible at cell phone photos and I really wanted to get this post published.

Then I went down the the Tangent Gallery, aka one of my homes away from home, to help DVS hang a couple pieces of art for the Gates of Ra event. That got a little bit crazy since it was a "DIY," hang your own art situation, but they hadn't figured out the wall space yet. Luckily, this meant I got to chat with Jason of Motor City Bonsai who also helps manage the Chaos Talent models group with and help him unpack some awesome little clay mushrooms. If you haven't seen his bonsais and pottery, you should go check out Motor City Bonsai on Facebook! Oh, and remember this self portrait I posted a bit ago? That is one of his creations I am holding.

The Offering, a self portrait by Dekilah

The rest of Saturday was spent preparing for the 1st Detroit Rummage sale. Sunday morning DVS and I arrived to find that the show before us hadn't cleared out all of their stuff yet, so we had to scramble to move things around. Thank goodness for Joe, the owner of Tangent (who is always awesome), and a couple vendors who had booths and came in early, since they helped us move all that stuff. A bit later on, a very awesome fan of mine stopped by to help, too. There for a couple hours I was totally on super quick event elf mode getting all of the vendors in their spaces, helping them figure out where to load in, and solving some minor issues. Once the event opened, everyone settled in and things went really well.

I sold a lot of my clothes and accessories I brought, and I even found some stuff to buy too. I'm sure I'll be featuring them in future outfits and photos. My favorite part of the whole of event was seeing all the friends that were there and getting to meet a few of my FB friends/fans. Apparently I look both shorter and younger in person ^_~ Just for fun here is a photo of me posing with a giant Darth Vader head that was at the event: